“To Belittle Is To Be Little”

Too often, children grow up in home environments that perpetuate screaming, hollering, yelling, and are demeaning.  The low self-esteem of the parents is transferred to the child who then grows up thinking that demeaning others gives them power. 

Back in the day, business thinking was the more one would yell, holler, and scream, the more terrified the employee.  The more terrified the employee, the more work they would do.  It was a time of “if you don’t like it, don’t let the door hit you in the behind.”

Thanks to the introduction of Japanese ABCM (Activity Based Cost Management), we know that type of dysfunctional behavior costs companies millions of dollars in high employee turnover and low productivity.  Simply put, being nasty comes with a heavy price tag to the corporation.   

Employees at all levels of the organization need to develop the skill of giving praise and encouragement.  This does not mean lying to people, this means being able to select some positive comment to the person.

The Power of Praise

þ  Build the skill of giving praise and encouragement.

§         If you did not grow up it, it will take time to understand that “demeaning only” is not “tough love”.  It’s dysfunctional.

þ  Look at the entire situation and emphasize the positive first.

§         It’s part of current “coaching” management style.

þ  Give positive direction not just negative criticism.

§         Anyone can belittle others.  Go to a playground and see.

þ  Distinguish and praise incremental steps taken towards achievement.

§         It takes time for people to change their ways.  Give credit where due.  It will encourage continued good behavior towards success.

To both parents and leaders, sit down at the kitchen table at home or the conference table at work.  Have everyone at the table list one “praise” phrase.  It doesn’t have to be more than 2 words – good job, great job.   As a start, just add an adjective to the word “job”.  Expand the phrases as you get more comfortable (high five, WOW, etc).  Use at least one phrase every day.  Eventually, it will come naturally. 

Let’s be honest:  Who does not want to work in an environment that appreciates and therefore, motivates you?